{"id":6740,"date":"2021-03-27T20:56:13","date_gmt":"2021-03-28T03:56:13","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/?p=6740"},"modified":"2021-03-27T20:56:13","modified_gmt":"2021-03-28T03:56:13","slug":"review-alien-quarantine-rescue-robin-lovett","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/index.php\/2021\/03\/27\/review-alien-quarantine-rescue-robin-lovett\/","title":{"rendered":"Review: Alien Quarantine Rescue &#8211; Robin Lovett"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"bookreview\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/03\/57346346._SY475_.jpg?w=1280\" alt=\"Review: Alien Quarantine Rescue &#8211; Robin Lovett\" title=\"Review: Alien Quarantine Rescue &#8211; Robin Lovett\" class=\"ubb-cover-image alignright\"><strong>Alien Quarantine Rescue<\/strong><br>by <a href=\"http:\/\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/index.php\/reviews\/authors\/robin-lovett\/\">Robin Lovett<\/a> <br><strong>Publisher:<\/strong> <a href=\"http:\/\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/index.php\/reviews\/publishers\/self-published\/\">Self-Published<\/a> <br><strong>Publication Date:<\/strong> March 19, 2021 <br><strong>Genres:<\/strong> <a href=\"http:\/\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/index.php\/reviews\/genres\/romance\/\">Romance<\/a>, <a href=\"http:\/\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/index.php\/reviews\/genres\/science-fiction\/\">Science Fiction<\/a> <br><strong>Pages:<\/strong> 312 <br><strong>Source:<\/strong> <a href=\"http:\/\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/index.php\/reviews\/sources\/purchased\/\">Purchased<\/a> <br><br>My rating: <span class=\"ubb-buy\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/llama-40.png?fit=31%2C40\" alt=\"One Star\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/llama-40.png?fit=31%2C40\" alt=\"One Star\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/llama-40.png?fit=31%2C40\" alt=\"One Star\"><\/span><br><br><br><blockquote class=\"ubb-synopsis\"><p>  <b>I\u2019ve been alone in quarantine for five years. Then a hot alien lands in my yard claiming he\u2019ll give me antibodies to the virus with his vibrating\u2026 Well, you know.<\/b><\/p>\n<p>I haven\u2019t touched anyone, let alone slept with anyone, since the Beerona Virus killed half of Earth\u2019s population. This virus mutates faster than scientists can create a vaccine for it. I\u2019ve lost all my family and all hope of seeing my friends again.<\/p>\n<p>Until a naked, silver alien comes for me. The only words he knows are \u201cGive antibodies\u201d and \u201cMine.\u201d<br \/>\nHe could be lying. He could have Beerona. I could be dead in three days after the virus eats me from the inside out. But I haven\u2019t had sex in so long, and he\u2019s as strong as a gladiator, as beautiful as Adonis, and did I mention his big\u2026 Yeah, it really vibrates.<\/p>\n<p>He needs things from me. Things he\u2019s not telling me. He might be here to kidnap me, to take me back to his ship. I don\u2019t know. But if he can give me antibodies, I could get my life back. I could have my friends and hugs...<\/p>\n<p>And tons of filthy, mind-blowing alien sex.<br \/>\nWhat should I do? Should I open the door?<\/p>\n<p>  <b>Would you let him in?&nbsp;<\/b><\/p>\n<p>  <em>Set during a fictional futuristic pandemic, Alien Quarantine Rescue is the first book in a new sci-fi erotic romance series with alien fated mates, a happily-ever-after, and alien vaccination sex.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>  <em><\/em><br \/>\n  <em>If you like reading dirty talk, fluid play, and backdoor&nbsp;alien sex, this book is for you.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em><\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote><center><span class=\"ubb-buy\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.com\/gp\/product\/B08YFL37G1\/\" target=\"_blank\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/amazon.png?w=1280\" alt=\"Amazon\"><\/a><\/span><\/center><center><a href=\"https:\/\/www.goodreads.com\/book\/show\/57346346-alien-quarantine-rescue\" target=\"_blank\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/widget_logo.gif?w=1280\" alt=\"Goodreads\"><\/a><br><\/center><center><p class=\"ubb-buy\"><div class=\"ubb-icon-tags\"><a href=\"http:\/\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/index.php\/reviews\/book-tags\/3stars\/\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"80\" height=\"100\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/categories_0000s_0002_3-stars.png?fit=80%2C100\" class=\"attachment-full size-full\" alt=\"3 stars icon\" \/><\/a> <a href=\"http:\/\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/index.php\/reviews\/book-tags\/aliens\/\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"80\" height=\"101\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/12\/categories_0008_alien-copy.png?fit=80%2C101\" class=\"attachment-full size-full\" alt=\"aliens\" \/><\/a> <a href=\"http:\/\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/index.php\/reviews\/book-tags\/m-f\/\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"80\" height=\"101\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/categories_0003_m_f-copy.png?fit=80%2C101\" class=\"attachment-full size-full\" alt=\"m\/f\" \/><\/a> <a href=\"http:\/\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/index.php\/reviews\/book-tags\/romance\/\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"82\" height=\"100\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/categories_0000s_0017_romance.png?fit=82%2C100\" class=\"attachment-full size-full\" alt=\"romance icon\" \/><\/a> <a href=\"http:\/\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/index.php\/reviews\/book-tags\/scifi\/\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"80\" height=\"100\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/categories_0000s_0013_scifi.png?fit=80%2C100\" class=\"attachment-full size-full\" alt=\"scifi icon\" \/><\/a><\/div><\/p><\/div><\/center><br>\t\t<script type=\"application\/ld+json\">\n{\n\t\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\n\t\"@type\":\"Review\",\n\t\"datePublished\": \"2021-03-28T03:56:13+00:00\",\n\t\"description\": \"\\r\\n\\r\\ncontent warnings: \\r\\n\\r\\nI very much enjoyed the Planet of Desire series, so I went into this looking for more sexy bananapants fun. I figured that the pandemic setting would either be too much \",\n\t\"publisher\": {\n\t\t\"@type\": \"Organization\",\n\t\t\"name\": \"Llama Reads Books\"\t},\n\t\"url\": \"http:\\\/\\\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\\\/blog\\\/index.php\\\/2021\\\/03\\\/27\\\/review-alien-quarantine-rescue-robin-lovett\\\/\",\n\t\"itemReviewed\": {\n\t\t\"@type\": \"Book\",\n\t\t\"name\": \"Alien Quarantine Rescue\",\n\t\t\"author\": {\n\t\t\t\"@type\": \"Person\",\n\t\t\t\"name\": \"Robin Lovett\",\n\t\t\t\"sameAs\": \"\"\t\t},\n\t\t\"isbn\": \"\"\t},\n\t\"author\": {\n\t\t\"@type\": \"Person\",\n\t\t\"name\": \"ReadingLlama\",\n\t\t\"sameAs\": \"http:\\\/\\\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\\\/blog\\\/\"\t},\n\t\"reviewRating\": {\n\t\t\"@type\": \"Rating\",\n\t\t\"ratingValue\": 3,\n\t\t\"bestRating\": \"5\"\n\t}\n}\n\n\n\n\t\t<\/script>\n\t\t<hr \/>\n<p>content warnings: <span class=\"ubb-spoiler\"><a class=\"ubb-view-spoil\">View Spoiler &raquo;<\/a><span style=\"display: none;\" class=\"ubb-thespoil\">enforced isolation (because of pandemic and government lockdown), fear of dying from pandemic, half of global population dead from pandemic (including relatives), medical procedures, abortion (in the past), gun violence, climate change <a class=\"ubb-hide-spoil\" style=\"cursor: hand; cursor: pointer;\">&laquo; Hide Spoiler<\/a><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n<p>I very much enjoyed the Planet of Desire series, so I went into this looking for more sexy bananapants fun. I figured that the pandemic setting would either be too much (given the past year) or just right, and it ended up being a mix of both. And this is definitely banana pants, but the sexy missed the mark a bit for me.<\/p>\n<p>Unlike the previous series, this book is set on Earth after a pandemic (the Beerona, a name that made me roll my eyes so hard) has killed half the population. It mutates too quickly to make a vaccine, so quickly in fact that two people could carry different mutations and any contact with another person could lead to death three days later. Almost everyone\u2019s spent the past five years alone, and recently the new fascist government has outlawed even leaving your house, which is enforced by drones. (I totally didn\u2019t get this part and it seemed only to exist to add some external conflict later?) Look, none of this makes any sense. Basically, it sets up a very lonely, touch-starved heroine and then an alien who basically tells her he can vaccinate her\u2026 with his come. From his giant silver dick. In as many orifices as possible. But of course, the alien wants something in return\u2026<\/p>\n<p>So up to a certain point, this was all the bananapants ridiculousness I expected. And then\u2026. look, when it warns you about fluid play, it\u2019s not kidding. There\u2019s like buckets of the stuff all over the place, and there\u2019s lots of porn-worthy dialog about \u201cooh, yes, please fill me up with come!!!\u201d That\u2019s seriously not my thing, but there was a Planet of Desire book with some similar stuff that I still mostly enjoyed the sex scenes, while I found these ones, well, boring. Part of it was that it&#8217;s very insta-lust with a side of fated-mates, so there&#8217;s not a lot of buildup between Gun, the alien, arriving and the sexy times starting. Ellie can&#8217;t seem to make up her mind about Gun, and overreacted to some things (she thinks he&#8217;s a robot at one point and it really upsets her) and underreacted to others. Similarly, the tone rockets back and forth between \u201cI\u2019m going to DIE in three days!\u201d anxiety to \u201cImma fill you with come!\u201d sex, and it was jarring. There&#8217;s also a bit of climate change anxiety in there, between Ellie and her friends living in what&#8217;s now the desert (due to climate change) and why exactly the aliens are visiting Earth.<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>\u201cIt\u2019s not stupid to hope. Hope is what keeps us alive.\u201d<br \/>\nShe refuses to look at me, just stares down at her hands. \u201cNo. Letting go of hope is the only reason I\u2019ve kept myself sane.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>I liked Ellie&#8217;s friends, especially how \u201coh honey no\u201d they were with her, you know, boinking a random silver alien for antibodies. I especially liked Charley, who didn&#8217;t hesitate to ream Ellie out for missing their daily check-ins, and who also was just incredibly adventurous.\u00a0I liked the bits with Gun (yes Gun, the alien language is partially unable to be spoken with human throats so they just use the end bits of their names which all end up being words like Gun, Death, Fear\u2026) and the rest of the aliens, but I was ridiculously annoyed that Gun waited as long as he did before telling Ellie why the aliens were on Earth and, most especially, that they were under a time limit. And while there are some queer characters, in the end Ellie and Gun&#8217;s HEA is very heteronormative, down to marriage and pregnancy.<\/p>\n<p>Overall, there\u2019s a lot to hand wave, from the whole virus, to the antibodies, to how the humans are supposed to help the aliens. But let&#8217;s be honest,\u00a0even with all that, I would still probably accept vaccination via alien dick if it showed up on my doorstep tomorrow, so\u00a0I\u2019ll most likely pick up the next book in the series.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>content warnings: I very much enjoyed the Planet of Desire series, so I went into this looking for more sexy bananapants fun. I figured that the pandemic setting would either be too much (given the past year) or just right, and it ended up being a mix of both. And this is definitely banana pants,&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":6683,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"ub_ctt_via":"","_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[8],"tags":[],"book-tag":[162,792,584,165,193],"reading-challenges":[],"class_list":["post-6740","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-reviews","book-author-robin-lovett","book-publisher-self-published","book-genre-romance","book-genre-science-fiction","book-source-purchased","book-format-ebook","book-tag-3stars","book-tag-aliens","book-tag-m-f","book-tag-romance","book-tag-scifi"],"acf":[],"featured_image_src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/03\/57346346._SY475_.jpg?fit=298%2C475","author_info":{"display_name":"ReadingLlama","author_link":"http:\/\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/index.php\/author\/readingllama\/"},"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Review: Alien Quarantine Rescue - Robin Lovett - Llama Reads Books<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"http:\/\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/index.php\/2021\/03\/27\/review-alien-quarantine-rescue-robin-lovett\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Review: Alien Quarantine Rescue - Robin Lovett - Llama Reads Books\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"content warnings: I very much enjoyed the Planet of Desire series, so I went into this looking for more sexy bananapants fun. 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