{"id":3700,"date":"2018-12-12T17:40:18","date_gmt":"2018-12-13T01:40:18","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/?p=3700"},"modified":"2018-12-12T17:45:25","modified_gmt":"2018-12-13T01:45:25","slug":"review-in-love-with-alien-santa-claus-zara-zenia","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/index.php\/2018\/12\/12\/review-in-love-with-alien-santa-claus-zara-zenia\/","title":{"rendered":"Review: In Love with Alien Santa Claus &#8211; Zara Zenia"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"bookreview\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/12\/42847966.jpg?w=1280\" alt=\"Review: In Love with Alien Santa Claus &#8211; Zara Zenia\" title=\"Review: In Love with Alien Santa Claus &#8211; Zara Zenia\" class=\"ubb-cover-image alignright\"><strong>In Love with Alien Santa Claus<\/strong><br>by <a href=\"https:\/\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/index.php\/reviews\/authors\/zara-zenia\/\">Zara Zenia<\/a> <br><strong>Publisher:<\/strong> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/index.php\/reviews\/publishers\/zara-zenia\/\">Zara Zenia<\/a> <br><strong>Publication Date:<\/strong> November 15, 2018 <br><strong>Genres:<\/strong> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/index.php\/reviews\/genres\/romance\/\">Romance<\/a> <br><strong>Pages:<\/strong> 178 <br><strong>Source:<\/strong> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/index.php\/reviews\/sources\/purchased\/\">Purchased<\/a> <br><br>My rating: <span class=\"ubb-buy\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/llama-40.png?fit=31%2C40&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"One Star\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/llama-40.png?fit=31%2C40&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"One Star\"><\/span><br><br><br><blockquote class=\"ubb-synopsis\"><p><i>Do you believe in Santa?<\/i> <\/p>\n<p>Yeah, Kris doesn\u2019t either.<br \/>\nBut since his ship got stranded above earth,<br \/>\nand an antigravity accident left him with flying reindeer,<br \/>\nhe\u2019s decided to make the legend come to life.<br \/>\nThe presents he brings aren\u2019t the traditional dolls and rocking horses.<br \/>\nInstead he finds kids who need help\u2014serious help\u2014and gives it to them.<br \/>\nCancer cured.<br \/>\nHouses fixed.<br \/>\nParents healed.<br \/>\nThere\u2019s one little girl he helped years ago<br \/>\nwho he\u2019s kept tabs on.<br \/>\nAnd she\u2019s grown into a beautiful woman.<br \/>\nHe\u2019s forced himself to keep his distance,<br \/>\nbut when an equipment malfunction gets him stuck in a chimney,<br \/>\nBlitzen brings her to his rescue.<br \/>\nWill she be able to accept him?<br \/>\nOr will the truth of his identity drive her away?<\/p>\n<p><b><i>In Love With Alien Santa Claus<\/i> is standalone, science fiction holiday romance story that features a loving human female and a generous alien. This page-turning science fiction romance story has no cliffhanger, no cheating, and a guaranteed happy ending!<\/b><\/p>\n<\/blockquote><center><span class=\"ubb-buy\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.com\/gp\/product\/B07KMKNRQR\/r\" target=\"_blank\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/amazon.png?w=1280\" alt=\"Amazon\"><\/a><\/span><\/center><center><a href=\"https:\/\/www.goodreads.com\/book\/show\/42847966-in-love-with-alien-santa-claus\" target=\"_blank\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/widget_logo.gif?w=1280\" alt=\"Goodreads\"><\/a><br><\/center><center><p class=\"ubb-buy\"><div class=\"ubb-icon-tags\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/index.php\/reviews\/book-tags\/2stars\/\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"80\" height=\"100\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/categories_0000s_0001_2-stars.png?fit=80%2C100&amp;ssl=1\" class=\"attachment-full size-full\" alt=\"2 stars icon\" \/><\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/index.php\/reviews\/book-tags\/aliens\/\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"80\" height=\"101\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/12\/categories_0008_alien-copy.png?fit=80%2C101&amp;ssl=1\" class=\"attachment-full size-full\" alt=\"aliens\" \/><\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/index.php\/reviews\/book-tags\/holiday\/\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"80\" height=\"100\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/categories_0000s_0015_holiday.png?fit=80%2C100&amp;ssl=1\" class=\"attachment-full size-full\" alt=\"holiday\" \/><\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/index.php\/reviews\/book-tags\/m-f\/\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"80\" height=\"101\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/categories_0003_m_f-copy.png?fit=80%2C101&amp;ssl=1\" class=\"attachment-full size-full\" alt=\"m\/f\" \/><\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/index.php\/reviews\/book-tags\/romance\/\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"82\" height=\"100\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/categories_0000s_0017_romance.png?fit=82%2C100&amp;ssl=1\" class=\"attachment-full size-full\" alt=\"romance icon\" \/><\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/index.php\/reviews\/book-tags\/scifi\/\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"80\" height=\"100\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/categories_0000s_0013_scifi.png?fit=80%2C100&amp;ssl=1\" class=\"attachment-full size-full\" alt=\"scifi icon\" \/><\/a><\/div><\/p><\/div><\/center><br>\t\t<script type=\"application\/ld+json\">\n{\n\t\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\n\t\"@type\":\"Review\",\n\t\"datePublished\": \"2018-12-13T01:40:18+00:00\",\n\t\"description\": \"\\r\\n\\r\\nSomeone on Twitter posted this as an example of a WTF cover, and when I saw it was on Kindle Unlimited, I thought, \\\"Yes! \\u00a0I could go for a kitschy so-bad-it's-good alien santa story!\\\" \\u00a0Alas\",\n\t\"publisher\": {\n\t\t\"@type\": \"Organization\",\n\t\t\"name\": \"Llama Reads Books\"\t},\n\t\"url\": \"https:\\\/\\\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\\\/blog\\\/index.php\\\/2018\\\/12\\\/12\\\/review-in-love-with-alien-santa-claus-zara-zenia\\\/\",\n\t\"itemReviewed\": {\n\t\t\"@type\": \"Book\",\n\t\t\"name\": \"In Love with Alien Santa Claus\",\n\t\t\"author\": {\n\t\t\t\"@type\": \"Person\",\n\t\t\t\"name\": \"Zara Zenia\",\n\t\t\t\"sameAs\": \"\"\t\t},\n\t\t\"isbn\": \"\"\t},\n\t\"author\": {\n\t\t\"@type\": \"Person\",\n\t\t\"name\": \"ReadingLlama\",\n\t\t\"sameAs\": \"https:\\\/\\\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\\\/blog\\\/\"\t},\n\t\"reviewRating\": {\n\t\t\"@type\": \"Rating\",\n\t\t\"ratingValue\": 2,\n\t\t\"bestRating\": \"5\"\n\t}\n}\n\n\n\n\t\t<\/script>\n\t\t<hr \/>\n<p>Someone on Twitter posted this as an example of a WTF cover, and when I saw it was on Kindle Unlimited, I thought, &#8220;Yes! \u00a0I could go for a kitschy so-bad-it&#8217;s-good alien santa story!&#8221; \u00a0Alas, this story stayed firmly in the &#8220;it&#8217;s bad&#8221; category, plus, I&#8217;m sorry to say, the Santa in the story does not actually have bright red skin (a major disappointment for me, frankly).<\/p>\n<p>As a six year old, Jessica swears she was cured of leukemia by Santa Claus. \u00a0Sixteen\u00a0years later, she\u2019s still obsessed with her savior, going so far as to making sure her duplex has a fireplace and the thesis for her Folklore degree is, basically, &#8220;Santa does exist!!!&#8221; \u00a0Kristarkon Clausarkar, is an alien xenobiologist who\u2019d just collected a herd of reindeer for study when a meteor storm damaged his ship, rendering him trapped on Earth and causing an anti-gravity field leak that imbued the reindeer with special powers and himself with immortality and the ability to heal others. \u00a0With the three\u00a0other members of his crew, he visits and helps a hundred children every year on Christmas Eve. \u00a0Jessica is the only child who\u2019s ever woken up while he was treating them, and she\u2019s the only one he keeps checking back on year after year. \u00a0He always picks at least one kid in Jessica\u2019s neighborhood as an excuse to go visit her every Christmas. During the stop to help one such kid, his tech malfunctions and he ends up stuck halfway down a chimney, and his engineer back on\u00a0the\u00a0ship is having a temper tantrum, so Blitzen the reindeer runs off to get Jessica, who takes finding out that Santa is actually an alien pretty well, honestly.<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>&#8220;Never in her life would she have imagined her Santa could turn out to be such an incredible man. She had always known he had a special gift to share with the world and that he was the kindest most gentlest man on the planet, but she never would have thought of him as\u2026 well\u2026 sexy as sin. \u00a0And he was. The\u00a0man who held her so gently in his arms was the sexiest and most delicious man she\u2019d ever met. And he tasted like peppermint and smelled like Christmas cookies. Two of her favorite things.&#8221;<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>Look, I&#8217;m just going to leave the summary there, because if you haven&#8217;t had, like, a million WTF moments from that paragraph alone, I&#8217;m not really sure what else to say. \u00a0Besides her obsessive love of Santa, Jessica&#8217;s pretty lacking in any sort of character development. \u00a0She&#8217;s a virgin (of course), which doesn&#8217;t stop her from enjoying multiple rounds of (badly written) sexy time once Kris takes her back to his ship (oh, after he and his crew make her hot cocoa because I dunno why not). \u00a0I was willing to overlook the eyerollingly awful insta-love for the first bit of the book, but after Jesica helps Kris and the rest of his crew finish off their Christmas list, the plot pretty much grinds to a halt. \u00a0What would normally be the big &#8220;black moment&#8221; scene &#8211; where the couple fears they have irreconcilable differences and therefore their HEA is in jeopardy &#8211; is actually Christmas dinner at Jessica&#8217;s foster mom&#8217;s place. \u00a0I will say this had a lot of potential (Santa as an alien xenobiologist is super intriguing) but it never goes anywhere with it, and there&#8217;s too much weird crap left unchallenged. \u00a0When Jessica realizes that Kris has basically been spying on her for the past sixteen years (his magical tech version of &#8220;he sees you when you&#8217;re sleeping&#8221;) rather than being creeped out, she thinks it&#8217;s endearing.\u00a0The swear words consist of\u00a0\u201cSnowballs!\u201d and\u00a0\u201cOh thank jingle-bells\u201d and \u201choly sparkling tinsel,&#8221; and not only can Kris&#8217;s\u00a0magic fingers can be used to heal people, they, more mundanely, can act as the perfect hair dryer for curly hair. \u00a0Let&#8217;s not even get in to the fact that he&#8217;s responsible for the reindeer gaining basic intelligence, but he&#8217;s kept them semi-enslaved for the past couple of hundred years for their own good.<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>\u201cYou know what? You might not be the original Santa, but you are him. You make this day the most special day of the year for those most in need. If that\u2019s not Santa, then I don\u2019t know who he is.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>OK, I&#8217;ve made this crazysauce sound much more interesting than it is &#8211; the stuff I&#8217;ve listed is basically the best parts of the book. \u00a0The rest is 140-something pages of sheer boredom that I kept reading in the hopes that it would redeem itself. Overall, I can&#8217;t really recommend this, even for the crazy WTF factor.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Someone on Twitter posted this as an example of a WTF cover, and when I saw it was on Kindle Unlimited, I thought, &#8220;Yes! \u00a0I could go for a kitschy so-bad-it&#8217;s-good alien santa story!&#8221; \u00a0Alas, this story stayed firmly in the &#8220;it&#8217;s bad&#8221; category, plus, I&#8217;m sorry to say, the Santa in the story does&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":3702,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"_kad_post_classname":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[8],"tags":[10,39,40],"book-tag":[163,792,583,584,165,193],"class_list":["post-3700","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-reviews","tag-2-stars","tag-romance","tag-science-fiction","book-author-zara-zenia","book-publisher-zara-zenia","book-genre-romance","book-source-purchased","book-format-ebook","book-tag-2stars","book-tag-aliens","book-tag-holiday","book-tag-m-f","book-tag-romance","book-tag-scifi"],"acf":[],"featured_image_src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/12\/42847966.jpg?fit=316%2C475&ssl=1","author_info":{"display_name":"ReadingLlama","author_link":"https:\/\/www.llamareadsbooks.com\/blog\/index.php\/author\/readingllama\/"},"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.4 - 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